Wednesday, October 22, 2003

Hallelujah! Praise the Lord!

For truly, indeed, I have seen the 2nd coming of Christ. And this time He comes in a juicy divine sacrilicious form! I have supped upon the sweet sweet nectar of beefy goodness that is the A&W Steak Burger and nestled upon it's golden teet. I have tasted God!

Mark my words, from this day forth I shall only eat Steak Burgers. I will single-handedly re-invigorate the Canadian beef industry. I will piss off vegetarians by eating their share in meat. I will travel from city to city following the A&W Steak Burger phenomenon. I will call it... Burgerpalooza!

I swear, I'm going on an all-beef diet until the limited time offer expires, or I expire from Mad Cow, whichever comes first. And after I have done so, I will call up the fine folks at A&W to declare "Look at me bitches! I've eaten nothing but steak burgers and I'm rail thin! Take that Jared from Subway!". And thus my 15 minutes of fame shall be thrust upon an unsuspecting populace. And when they least suspect it, WANG!

Hell, I'll be so succesful that I'll open up a rival chain called Burger Wench which serves up the finest beefy treats with buxom scantily clad hoes (patent pending).

What? It's been done? Crap. Nevermind.

By TVT - 3:48 p.m. |

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