Saturday, October 18, 2003
This post is directly from the archives of Maddox.
Why can't commercials, TV, music, and everything be more original and interesting? How about this scenario for a tampon commercial:
The same gray haired mother is sitting on a couch talking to her daughter, when suddenly she remembers that there's only one tampon left in the house (because her and her daughter were talking about tampons, as they always do). She notices that her daughter is acting a bit peculiar, so she gets up to go to the bathroom to take the last tampon for herself. The daughter stands up and says "Over my dead body, bitch.." and takes out a sawed off shotgun from under her dress and blows her mother's head off. The mother staggers around the room for a bit, and collapses with a satisfying thud. The daughter screams "Oh no!! What have I done?!", as she realizes that in her shooting frenzy, a stray shot went into the bathroom cabinet and ruined the last tampon. She falls to her knees, sobbing uncontrollably. The camera pans over to the still smoking shotgun lying on the floor. She picks it up, puts it to her chin, and blows her face off. The camera fades to black and some guy says "Tampax... they're that good."